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22.11.2005 - jeu-citation
Le jeu de la citation préférée

Un nouveau jeu dans la blogosphère : donner sa citation préférée. Je m'y colle non sans prévenir les âmes sensibles et les tristounets de passer leur chemin.

Jeu de la citation préférée

Réquia, bloggeuse blagueuse me demande, sur une idée d'Anne, de donner ma citation préférée. Elle précise que je vais sûrement en trouver une "de la mort qui tue". Elle ne croyait pas si bien dire, je l'ai prise au pied de la lettre.

En effet m'est revenu en mémoire un voyage lorsque j'avais 18 ans et que je gambadais nonchalamment dans la savane, au milieu des pythons et des araignées poilues. J'avais fait ami-ami avec une beauté locale, à laquelle j'interdisais certaines pratiques amoureuses car elle était canibale. Un soir, alors que les percussions allaient bon train (jeu de mot un peu osé en ce jour de grève de la SNCF) et que les femmes étaient gagnées par la transe (napolitaine, évidemment), le sorcier qui préparait le repas fait d'un missionnaire et d'une infirmière (c'était jour de fête) m'avait fait cette remarque empreinte de bon sens canibale "Dis-moi qui tu manges, je te dirai qui tu hais". C'est sans doute de cette citation que naquit ma vocation gastronomique. Le repas fut un vrai régal, puisqu'en tant qu'invité d'honneur j'ai eu droit aux deux nichons de l'infirmière (pas trace de plastique fondu, ce devait être des vrais) et aux animelles du missionnaire. Ces dernières, bouillies, auraient pu être meilleures. Aussi le lendemain, après avoir capturé un jeune garçon français, ils se réunirent pour statuer sur son sort. Finalement, ils décidèrent de le gracier eu égard à son jeune âge, mais prélevèrent sur sa personne une couillette pour que je leur apprenne la technique de cuisson "sautée" et non "bouillie". Ce que je fis, en proposant au sorcier et au chef du village de se la partager. Ils me donnèrent immédiatement les médailles du crocodile boisbandé et de la girafe lascive, et je repartis le lendemain en écoutant les pleurs déchirants de ma beauté. Quelle ne fut pas ma surprise en reconnaissant récemment le jeune monorchide qui prétend se présenter au trône de France en 2007 sous le nom de Nain 1er !

Je ne transmets ce jeu à personne, ceux qui ont envie n'ont qu'à se servir, car il faut quand même être sévèrement burné (excuse moi Nicolas, ça m'a échappé) pour raconter des conneries comme ça à 4 heures du mat '

Néanmoins, je ne vous quitterai pas sans vous rappeler une pensée du grand (1 m 69 debout, 1 m 22 assis et 0 m 92 roulé en boule) Pierre Dac : "En matière de médecine policière une fausse piste n'est pas forcément d'origine blennorragique".

Sur ce, bonne nuit, ou bonne bourre, c'est selon.

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Vos commentaires

22 11 2005 - 07:30 par Anaik

Baaaaaahhhhhh ! C'est dégueu !

22 11 2005 - 07:31 par frederique

c'est un billet que l'on pourrait nommer :
"tout cru !" il aurait pu faire parti du livre de cuisine du même nom .....bravo pour cet enchainement !

22 11 2005 - 08:54 par Requia

Je suis morte de rire, c'est excellent comme toujours !! Je savais que je ne serais pas decue !!
Dis donc tu veux dire que Nain 1er, celui qui se presente au trone de France pour 2007 n'en a qu'une ? :-D

22 11 2005 - 09:14 par mercotte

A l'heure où je me lève , je vois que tu es toujours en pleine forme juste avant de te coucher !!

22 11 2005 - 09:55 par menus propos

Avec un humour pareil, l'auteur est bien "couillu"..., lui! Ah, ça fait du bien de rire le matin. Merci.

22 11 2005 - 09:58 par Choupette

Et moi qui croyait que Patrick était quelqu'un de très sérieux........Je suis morte de rire !

22 11 2005 - 10:42 par lilizen

rabelaisien en diable!

22 11 2005 - 13:09 par avital

Génial! J'adoooooooore!!!
Choupette, j'ai arrêté de croire que Patrick était "sérieux" après son "qu'est-ce-que c'est spécial gourmandes"!!!

22 11 2005 - 14:43 par Anne (Papilles)

J'espère que le missionnaire était diabétique, c'est meilleur en dessert.
Et en vin, qu'est ce qui s'accorde le mieux avec une infirmière ?? C'est toujours utile de savoir ...

Je sais pas pourquoi mais j'ai un peu de mal à t imaginer gambadant nonchalament dans la savane.

24 11 2005 - 23:26 par penglobe

tres frais!
;-)

25 11 2005 - 11:56 par Tancrède

Bien que cette histoire me semble un peu fantastique surtout le coup du "au milieu des pythons et des araignées poilues", comme si c'était possible.

Mais je regarderai à deux fois dans mon assiette lorsque mon père me fera à manger, par peur d'y trouver quelques plats exotiques venus de savane.

25 11 2005 - 16:07 par Ajm

Pour commencer j'emprunterai à Diderot:
"Il y a un peu de testicules au fond de nos sentiments les plus sublimes et de notre tendresse la plus épurée."
Pour finir, je rappellerai que des animelles (va pour ...) d'agneau toutes fraiches,juste épluchées, tranchées en 2, pannées, cuites à point au beurre d'escargot et servies telles avec un jus de citron ou un trait de vinaigre sont une délicatesse plus fine que le plus fin des ris de veau. Quand j'ai connu mon épouse au fin fond du Limousin, il y a ... (oh! ben oui, guère plus mais pas moins ...)
ça se faisait encore habituellement de provoquer le citadin en lui servant un beau plat de, néanmoins mal nommées, amourettes.

13 04 2006 - 11:21 par jean dirassen

Ainsi, selon Pierre Dac, c'est quand la piste est chaude que ça démange l'envieux quêteur?

08 10 2007 - 22:14 par sylviane

j´aimerais recois les citations amoureuses

08 10 2007 - 22:14 par sylviane

j´aimerais recois les citations amoureuses

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12.01.2012 - eaudevie-dossier-armagnac
Quelques chiffres vous sont livrés pour commencer cette dernière partie qui se termine par une tirade sur les Mousquetaires. Ce Fabian Barnes est un visionnaire, l’histoire est en marche puisque Michel Portos vient de s’installer à Bordeaux. Certes, ça n’a aucun rapport, mais ça me faisait plaisir.

Flan de courgettes et champignons
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Pour accompagner une viande blanche ou un poisson, ou seul ce plat gouté sera toujours apprécié.

Poulet de Bresse au vin jaune et aux morilles
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Plat mythique, aux étonnantes saveurs, qui allie une volaille au goût remarquable résultat d'un élevage traditionnel et rigoureux, les meilleurs des champignons, à mon goût, et le vin jaune rare et exceptionnel.

Quelques règles pour la cueillette des champignons
13.11.2011 - histoire
Ne faites pas comme Agrippine qui fit passer ad patres son tendre époux en lui servant un plat d'oronge qui étaient en vérité des fausses oronges. Depuis la vraie oronge est appelée amanite des Césars.

Domaine des Hauts de Loire, déjeuner du 16 juin 2007
11.11.2011 - restaurant-repas
Ce samedi 16 juin 2007 en route pour Paris, nous faisons une halte pour déjeuner. Nous sommes deux à table et nous laissons faire le chef Rémy Giraud et le directeur Bernard Lacroix.

Les champignons
02.11.2011 - histoire
Voici venue la saison des champignons !On met ses souliers imperméables, un gros pull, on prend un panier en osier, un bon couteau et on part en famille les ramasser en forêt.On revient souvent bredouille, mais on a respiré les senteurs de la forêt, les feuilles mouillées, la mousse, on a les joues roses et de belles feuilles mortes que les enfants apporteront à leurs maîtresses pour faire un herbier !

Moissac, le Pont Napoléon, qu'ai-je mangé ?
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Puisque ce jeu consistant à reconnaitre les plats de mes repas gastronomique semble amuser certains, nous voici au Pont Napoléon, à Moissac, chez Michel Dussau, dont on se demande pourquoi il n'est pas étoilé Michelin, pour le déjeuner du 28 décembre 2005.

Morzine - Hébergement
Le Dahu
23.08.2011 - TOURISME - morzine - hebergement
Il existe en France une multitude de chaînes volontaires d'hôtels. L'une d'entre elles mérite qu'on s'y attarde : les Hôtels-Chalets de tradition. ce sont des établissements de moins de 50 chambres, dans les plus beaux villages des Alpes, gérés en famille et où les enfants sont bienvenus et choyés. Poussons la porte des deux situés sur Morzine, et survolons les autres. Pour continuer, le Dahu...

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Le Wy, Arsac-en-Médoc, Gironde, Aquitaine, déjeuner du vendredi 5 octobre 2007
07.08.2011 - wy-repas
Dans le cadre de ses rencontres « Mollat – Slow Food », Ségolène envisage de consacrer la prochaine aux accords chocolat/porto et caviar/champagne. La maison Laurent Perrier nous invite donc au Wy où devrait avoir lieu cet évènement.

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